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As the saying goes, "Jade requires carving to become a vessel." Therefore, as a manager, if you want to build a well-trained, united, and effective team, and if you want your subordinates to complete tasks in the way you expect and achieve desired results, you must effectively master the tool of "criticism" to correct, regulate, and shape employee behavior and team culture, thereby enhancing overall team effectiveness.
But let's pause and reflect: Do we, as managers with titles like "General Manager," "Director," "Manager," or "Supervisor," truly understand how to criticize employees effectively? Do we really grasp the "small skills" and "big principles" of criticizing employees? Let's look at a real case below—a "help-seeking letter" from a general manager about criticizing employees.
A General Manager's Dilemma: How Should I Point Out Subordinates' Shortcomings?
First, I don't consider myself a perfectionist or overly strict person. I know no employee is perfect, and I don't expect every employee to meet all my expectations. So, please don't reply with those big principles; I need practical techniques now.
Second, the question that has been troubling me is whether I should point out subordinates' shortcomings and how to do it.
I recently joined this company. After observing for a while, I found that several employees lack the ability, expertise, and experience for their positions. This is a network company, and our revenue mainly comes from advertising. I occasionally point out their mistakes at work—specific errors, not general principles.
However, they all left later, saying I wasn't a good leader and that I complained all day. Honestly, I'm a positive person who never blames fate. I've been through various setbacks without changing my attitude. So their departure isn't a loss to me; I just worry about their future.
But now there's something I find hard to handle. Among the remaining old employees, my assistant is the one I trust most. I discuss almost everything with her. She is dedicated, works hard, and often works overtime.
But she has two flaws I can't accept: she is somewhat selfish and tends to make excuses. Because she is my most loyal aide, she has more power than average managers. She might overstate expenses or buy small items for herself when shopping.
She also tends to make excuses. For example, she makes excuses for being late, or claims her phone was dead to explain not returning calls... Many of these excuses are untenable.
I hesitated and thought for a long time about this flaw. But I finally brought it up because if she doesn't correct it, I'm worried, and it's detrimental to the company's development.
When I communicated with her, I used a specific incident. She didn't do something well, and when I criticized her, she blamed other employees for not cooperating. That annoyed me; I suspected she hadn't communicated clearly. But I called the other employee to verify, and indeed, that colleague hadn't received clear instructions (though if that colleague were more perceptive, they might have inferred the task, but we can't expect that of an employee).
So I used that incident to expand and criticize her shortcomings. I told her why I was so angry—not just about the current issue, but about her own flaws.
That was a turning point. Since then, her enthusiasm has waned, she's less proactive, and she no longer shows concern for me. She just does her work routinely, doesn't offer opinions, and only does what she's told...
So I'm really confused: What should I do when subordinates have shortcomings? I'm a general manager, after all. Can't I even mention their mistakes and flaws? Why do they react so strongly? Either they resign or become passively resistant?
So, what should I do next? Should I just ignore their shortcomings? Or should I change my approach? Actually, I've been very good to my employees, treating them like siblings. I don't like to put on airs, and I rarely use a commanding tone to assign tasks.
Two Major Obstacles to Effective Employee Criticism: Self-Righteousness and Lack of Self-Reflection
From this general manager's account, we see that the root problem is his self-righteousness—he always thinks he is right, and others should understand and obey, follow his requirements, or even meet his imagined expectations. When others' behavior differs from his expectations, he finds it incomprehensible and hopeless.
This is a common problem among many managers, and it's very typical in this case. For instance, he starts by saying, "First, I don't consider myself a perfectionist or overly strict person. I know no employee is perfect, and I don't expect every employee to meet all my expectations."
But anyone with management experience knows: when a person emphasizes that they "don't care about X," deep down they actually care about X. For example, in work, many people say, "First, I don't care about money, but I think the company's compensation system is..." But we all know they're talking about money.
This general manager repeatedly emphasizes that he is "not perfectionist" and "doesn't expect everything to meet his hopes," but from his own description ("I occasionally point out their mistakes") and the actual results ("they all left, saying I was a bad leader who complained all day"), his problem is precisely his perfectionism and self-righteousness.
Another root cause of his predicament is his lack of reflection and self-examination. After driving away so many employees, he still thinks the problem lies with others, not himself, because he says, "Honestly, I'm a positive person who never blames fate... Their departure is not a loss to me; I just worry about their future."
Worse, due to these two obstacles, he makes the mistake of "attending to trifles instead of essentials" when seeking solutions. He says, "So, please don't reply with those big principles; I need practical techniques now." This shows he hasn't realized that the root of his ineffective criticism is not a lack of "small skills" but a failure to understand the "big principles" of employee criticism and motivation.
As a manager, especially a general manager, if you only pursue "technical moves" and don't truly understand the "big principles" of human nature (which I call "top-notch skills"), your career development will be limited. So, what are the "big principles" of employee criticism? The biggest principle is: Respect the individual, correct the behavior.
The "Big Principle" of Employee Criticism: Respect the Individual, Correct the Behavior
When facing employees, the first thing a manager must do is treat them as thinking, feeling, living "people." In fact, whether your criticism achieves the desired effect depends not on how "noble" or "correct" your motives are, but on the subjective feelings of the person being criticized. If they feel "negative," "rejected," or "belittled," then no matter how correct, noble, or skillful you think your criticism is, you'll only get the opposite result—hostility, resentment, or even resistance.
Therefore, to make your criticism effective and have employees willingly accept your feedback and change, you must first understand the "big principle" of "respect": you must approach it from a genuine desire to help them improve, and deliver your criticism in a way that doesn't hurt their self-esteem and brings positive emotional experiences (or at least not negative ones). But what did the general manager in the case do? When his criticism didn't work, he resorted to "personal attacks" (even with a hint of "settling scores" and "turning angry"). In his words, "So I used that incident to expand and criticize her shortcomings. I told her why I was so angry—not just about the current issue, but about her own flaws." This is a major taboo in criticism: personal attack and lack of respect.
In fact, the fundamental purpose of criticizing employees is to "eliminate mistakes while protecting the individual," i.e., to correct inappropriate behavior without attacking their character or denying their worth. Therefore, the first principle of effective criticism is "criticize the behavior, respect the person." If you correct a specific behavior without hurting their feelings, they won't feel the need to defend themselves. However, criticism is like hammering a nail into a board. Even if you pull the nail out (the criticism passes), the hole remains. To make your criticism more effective and minimize this "nail hole effect," you need to win the employee's "acceptance," so they genuinely agree with your criticism.
So, how do you get employees to accept your criticism with respect? This involves the "skills" of criticism.
The "Big Wisdom" of Employee Criticism: Use Your Heart
Laozi said, "Great skill appears clumsy." This means true skill is not about clever tricks that go against nature, but about aligning with natural laws, and in that alignment, achieving your goals naturally.
So, what is the natural law of criticizing employees? It's the basic human desire for "respect." To align with this law and achieve effective criticism, the most important, basic, and simple technique is to use your heart—that is, as a manager, you must sincerely understand your employees' values, how they perceive things, and choose the best way to persuade them.
What kind of heart? Use the heart you have for customers, or the heart you have for your loved one when in love. Think about it: if you wanted to give negative feedback to a customer, you'd carefully think of the most acceptable way and try to show that your advice is beneficial to them. Similarly, if you wanted to criticize your partner, you'd choose a time when they're in a good mood, use the most tactful approach, patiently (even indirectly with examples or metaphors) to present the issue, ideally making them realize their behavior is inappropriate. Moreover, a wise critic will, after tactful criticism, take steps to ease the tension and give the other person a way out to eliminate the "nail hole."
So, when you feel your criticism isn't being accepted, ask yourself: Did I use my heart when criticizing my employees?
The "Small Skills" of Employee Criticism
Of course, management is both a science and an art, and criticizing employees has its methods and skills. After understanding the "big principles" and "big wisdom," let's explore a few small techniques.
Use benchmarking and praise to turn "criticism" into "self-criticism." We know that good children are praised, and good employees are also praised. Therefore, to encourage employees to change voluntarily, you need to understand that positive guidance is more effective than negative criticism. Use positive guidance, set examples and benchmarks, and demonstrate (preferably by leading yourself) to inspire change, rather than just criticizing. Everyone has a sense of honor; when they know the difference between "good" and "bad," they will self-reflect and self-criticize, and align with good behavior.
Don't always criticize personally; learn to shape team culture to correct wrong behavior. As a manager, especially a senior one, you should turn the values, behaviors, and ways of thinking you advocate into team culture and atmosphere. This way, team members will "supervise" and "criticize" on your behalf, rather than you always taking the lead and attracting all the fire, "carrying all the problems yourself."
Criticism should "focus on the big and let go of the small." Don't always fixate on trivial details. What is "big"? Principles, values, and performance goals are big. If these are violated or not achieved, you must hold people accountable. But you must also learn to let go of small things, especially those that differ from your own habits, thoughts, or approaches. Don't be like the employee said, "complaining all day." Who would like a leader who constantly negates them?
Be a gentle but strict manager. As a manager, a key criterion for your excellence is the results your team achieves. Without rules, nothing can be accomplished. Necessary behavioral constraints, corrections, and criticism are inevitable and even necessary. But strict requirements don't conflict with employee respect and obedience; it depends on how you do it. We know that behavior starts with goals, and results are achieved through behavior. If you set strict goals from the start, closely monitor behavior, and provide support, help, and feedback in a timely manner to help them achieve their goals and succeed, then they will see your care and respect behind your strict requirements and necessary criticism. The power of effective criticism comes from your genuine concern and help for them. The general manager in the case said, "I've been very good to my employees, treating them like siblings. I don't like to put on airs, and I rarely use a commanding tone to assign tasks." But he didn't understand what truly effective management is. Strict requirements have nothing to do with putting on airs. An effective manager is a strict but respected leader.
In management practice, there's a phenomenon worth noting: the higher your position, or the more you aspire to senior management, the more you should learn how to "criticize others effectively." Because, more often than not, the higher your position, the more you rely on the "authority" granted by the organization to criticize employees, assuming you're right, and thus neglecting to learn how to "criticize effectively and constructively." In fact, whether you can "effectively and constructively" criticize subordinates has nothing to do with your position. It's related to your "leadership cultivation."
Former U.S. President Eisenhower once said, "Leadership is the art of getting someone else to do something you want done because he wants to do it." As a leader and (senior) manager, your every word and action, your decisions, your speech, and even your facial expressions affect employee morale! But only correct guiding principles can lead to correct behavior. So, as a manager, can you afford not to learn effective criticism? Can you afford not to understand the "big principles" and "big wisdom" of effective criticism, and not to master, explore, practice, and refine the "small skills"? Of course not!
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