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A few years ago, I ran into an old friend, Mr. Niu, at a trade show. He was the procurement director at a project-based company, handling large orders worth millions—a truly coveted position.

After some reminiscing, Mr. Niu suddenly said, "You salespeople are beyond words. Call you stupid, and you think you're the most sophisticated bunch in society; call you smart, and you're actually hopeless fools."

I quickly asked, "Why do you say that? That's a sweeping condemnation."

"You spend all day studying how to 'sell,' but you never study how to 'buy,'" he said, shaking his head.

"Nonsense, we're in the business of selling; what else would we study?" I replied humbly.

"Don't you get it? Selling isn't about selling; it's about buying together with the customer! You muddle through selling, yet you expect us to buy clearly. You're like the blind leading the blind! You think you can manipulate customers, but we're in the shadows while you're in the spotlight. We can see how foolish your every move is," Mr. Niu said indignantly.

His words made me sweat a little, but I was also unconvinced. I asked, "Where do you think we're stupid?"

"There are many stupid things. You shout 'quality and low price' but don't know what we really want; you shout 'customer-centric' but never understand how we buy; you shout 'build relationships' but don't know how to help customers. Simply put, you never care why our demand department buys something, nor do you care about the procurement process we follow, nor the pressures on our procurement staff and demand department. As for the impact of a major purchase on people at all levels, you turn a deaf ear. Aren't you stupid?"

I was sweating cold, but I still had the nerve to ask, "Old friend, as the god of sales, could you, from a procurement perspective, explain in detail where we go wrong?"

"See, you're wrong again. Customers are not gods. Gods only help people, they don't need help. We're the opposite; we're people who need your help. If we didn't need help, why would we buy anything?" Mr. Niu caught me again. "But since you're sincere and still salvageable, I'll give you a free lesson."

Stupid Thing 1: Believing Procurement's Excuses, Never Reaching the Real Decision-Maker

Almost every salesperson has faced this: you struggle to see the boss. The reasons are varied: the boss is busy, I (middle-level staff) can decide, the boss is often away, etc.

So, many salespeople either believe the customer's lies or pretend the boss has no influence. Some even barge into the boss's office and end up hurt.

But have you thought: why doesn't the boss see you?

Mr. Niu's analysis: The boss doesn't see you because someone doesn't want you to! In most cases, it's not that the boss is busy, but that the middle-level procurement staff never intended for you to meet. The main reasons are:

  1. They don't feel your product can solve the problems they must solve. Note: it's "they" must solve, not "your product" can solve. Why help you if it's irrelevant to them?
  2. They never planned to choose you. If they didn't plan to choose you, why bring you to the boss? That would be asking for trouble, and the boss would scold them.
  3. They don't see your value. Even if they bring you to the boss, you're insignificant, and they don't know what you can do for them in front of the boss (like coordinating resources, enhancing their image, praising their work). If they don't see personal benefit, why help?
  4. You're too poor. During contact, they feel you're incompetent, and bringing you to the boss would embarrass them; the boss would blame them for poor work.

In the end, it's simple: this person never intended to buy from you. Of course, even if they bring you, they might not buy, but not bringing you almost certainly means they don't want to buy. So wake up, don't believe those strange excuses from procurement.

Stupid Thing 2: Mistaking Objections for Needs

The project is progressing smoothly, and you think all is well. But suddenly, the customer calls and asks, "How would your product solve this XX problem?"

You're stunned, realizing it's indeed hard to solve. What to do? You rack your brains to find a solution with your product team or find a workaround. You think once you solve this, the project will move forward smoothly.

Don't be foolish; after solving this, there will be a pile of problems waiting.

Mr. Niu's analysis: This is procurement finding fault, not finding problems. Procurement has a habit: early on, they focus on needs; mid-term, on products and solutions; late stage, on risks. At the end of a purchase, few consider needs anymore. Think about buying a house or car; don't you focus on maintenance and property management at the end?

Besides risk, there's another thing: how to make the supplier accept elimination. Procurement doesn't want to offend suppliers or owe them favors. For this, customers usually consult the supplier they plan to choose, asking for advice on finding faults.

Do you understand? This problem is most likely a trap set by the competitor and the customer together. Traps aren't scary; what's scary is someone helping your competitor. That person is naturally someone influencing the purchase. Worse, the customer might have already decided not to buy from you, just using this to prove how wise their choice is! (We salespeople are really pitiful!)

Stupid Thing 3: Happily Jumping into the Fire, Never Asking Where You Stand

I once met a salesperson nicknamed "Eternal Second"—no matter how difficult the deal or how many competitors, he would fight to the end, but the customer never chose him. He was proud of this, thinking it was just luck, not ability, and that he'd eventually become first.

Mr. Niu's analysis: You're second because someone wants you to be second. The luckiest salesperson is the one who wins; the second luckiest is the one eliminated first—early death, early rebirth, not wasting costs on us. The most unfortunate is the eternal second: doing all the work, spending all the money, but getting nothing. Being second is usually not about lack of ability, but lack of ability by far.

Why does procurement keep you involved when they know you won't win? Reasons include:

  1. Due diligence. Procurement must select multiple suppliers, constantly screening to avoid being cheated. So they leave room or speak bureaucratically. That's human nature. As a salesperson, learn to distinguish truth from falsehood; don't take a stick for a needle.
  2. Price negotiation tool. When are salespeople most likely to lower prices? When competition is fierce, right? Procurement knows this, so they keep a sucker to help lower the chosen supplier's price.
  3. You're a backup. Procurement isn't fully confident in their chosen target, fearing mishaps, so they keep you as a backup (merciful). If something goes wrong, you get a chance. But since it's a "what if," you basically have no chance. Sales usually has only first, no second.
  4. Procurement needs to show they work hard; you salespeople are proof of their diligence.
  5. They need to confirm their decision is right. How? By using your mistakes and stupidity to prove their wisdom. So they keep the stupidest one to accompany the "queen" to the end.
  6. Policies may require contacting multiple suppliers. Many companies have this rule, so they bring you in to make up the numbers.

Stupid Thing 4: Following Customer Orders Blindly

Many salespeople have a habit of treating customer requests as commands: do whatever they say, go wherever they point. If the customer asks for research, bring the best technicians for a week; if they want a proposal, stay up nights writing; if they want a presentation, send the best talker; if they want a quote, give the lowest price immediately.

Their reasoning: if we listen, the customer will like us; if they like us, they'll choose us. But the reality is, when they ask for the contract, the customer says the boss has decided to sign with someone else.

Mr. Niu's analysis: The only problem is that these things weren't planned together with the customer. Of course, the result isn't what you wanted.

Salespeople must firmly believe a basic rule: without a driving force behind, things won't move forward naturally. Either you push or your competitor pushes, and the criterion for "push or not" is who benefits. So if your competitor is pushing, it's to their advantage, meaning it's to your disadvantage. Why join the fun?

Though pies might fall from the sky, the probability is very low; you can't rely on that. When things are uncertain, the principle is: better to kill a thousand by mistake than let one slip through. What you think doesn't matter; what the customer does matters.

Salespeople should learn to create unfairness. If you do whatever they say, what's the point of you? The front desk girl could replace you. Stop being foolish!

Why can't you follow the customer's requirements step by step? From a procurement perspective:

  1. For complex purchases, we often buy only once in a lifetime or once in many years, like buying a house. So procurement staff often don't know how to buy; they have money but are confused. If they know exactly how to buy, think about who taught them? (This doesn't apply to daily consumables.) If the customer knows everything, it often means you're a substitute. If you follow step by step, where do you gain advantage? Without advantage, why choose you?
  2. You think your product fully meets our tender requirements, even better. But have you thought: who knows your product better, you salespeople or us procurement? It's you, right? How could we write such an excellent tender? Do you know who's writing it for us? That "who" will push you into the fire.
  3. As procurement, we're often questioned about fairness. But procurement decisions are often emotional; you can't define what's fair or unfair. What to do? Find someone to prove it. See, we did everything step by step, right? Ask the unfortunate salesperson.

Stupid Thing 5: Not Knowing How to Get Referrals

Salespeople love to say "win the person." But it's frustrating: sometimes you think you've won them, but at the critical moment they don't help—either they flee or get beaten by the competitor's supporters—leaving you anxious, lamenting you trusted the wrong person.

Why does this happen?

Mr. Niu's analysis: This is common. From my understanding, it's not usually that you trusted the wrong person, but that you don't know how to get referrals!

Your goal is to have them speak well of you. But have you thought: the person you trust might want to speak well but often doesn't know how, because they don't understand your product, or even if they do, they don't know how to say it.

How to say it is an art. They need to speak forcefully yet subtly, or they'll be exposed. But this high-difficulty task, you salespeople didn't prepare them in advance. How can they help you at the critical moment?

By the way, for your ally to help, the best way is to tell everyone how your product helps their own business. Because talking about their business is confident, they know it best, and others can't refute. More importantly, it easily masks their true intentions; even if seen through, it's useless: "I'm all for work!"

Stupid Thing 6: Hanging from One Tree

I've seen many projects where salespeople had very strong relationships with certain roles in the customer's procurement, and they absolutely supported us, but we still lost the deal. For example, we won over the procurement department, but the demand department came out and killed us, or vice versa. But if we win over both, the cost and effort are too high.

What to do?

Mr. Niu's analysis: Don't expect to hang from one tree; try several. This is very common, caused by internal games within the buying side. You must understand:

  1. Never believe we buyers are rational in choosing a product. On the contrary, the bigger the project, the more we use our emotions and impulses. If you attend our evaluation process, you'll see it's full of subjectivity, irrationality, and personal factors. This is inevitable because the more people, the more it's a multi-party game. Too many cooks spoil the broth, and this worsens in later stages.
  2. Not all votes weigh the same. Many projects involve many participants, a selection team, even a committee. Not only that, but there's often a set of scoring rules, with so-called authorities like university professors or external experts, each with evaluation rights. If you believe everyone is equal, you're foolish. You must believe: no matter how large the procurement organization, usually only one person makes the buying decision. So you must know who the real decision-maker is and who's just a rubber stamp.
  3. In a multi-person procurement organization, there are usually many who can veto. That is, if one person opposes, you might lose the deal. Making something happen is hard, but ruining it is easy.

Stupid Thing 7: Only Meeting Needs, Not Shaping Them

You procurement folks have it easy: when you want to buy, you send out a tender, and a bunch of suppliers come knocking. You just watch us salespeople fight, reaping the benefits.

But we salespeople have it hard: we fight tooth and nail, only one gets the bone, the others are bruised and get nothing. Why are we so unlucky?

Mr. Niu's analysis: You don't get the bone because you always go for the bone, ignoring the meat. Let me give an example. If we start a new project, like building a new factory, there will be a lot of procurement. Do you know what's hardest for our procurement department? I'll tell you: endless battles with the project construction department.

Think about it: for new projects, most of us in procurement don't understand, so we have to follow the construction department's advice. This effectively strips us of our procurement power. If you buy according to their suggestions, you'll find only one supplier fits—the one with a deep connection to someone in the construction department. But if you don't follow their advice, they'll say, "If something goes wrong, it's not my responsibility; it's yours." We can't afford that!

Do you understand? Salespeople shouldn't wait until the tender is issued to start working; you should get involved during the design phase. In your words, learn to shape needs, not just meet them. It takes longer, but you can truly swallow the meat. You think the ones who bite hard are the experts, but in our view, the real experts are those who snatch the meat before others even see it.

Stupid Thing 8: Selling Products as Solutions

Sometimes we salespeople think procurement is stupid too. We know a product is excellent—top-notch in function and quality, reasonably priced—but you refuse to choose it, picking something inferior. At first, we thought someone had won you over, but later we found out it was just your poor professionalism. We're helpless against such easily fooled procurement. Why is this?

Mr. Niu's analysis: Wrong! The cause isn't us procurement; it's you salespeople. Don't forget, buying and selling happen between people. We don't buy from proposals, bids, brochures, ads, or such; we buy from a living person. We want salespeople to truly help solve our problems, not just push products. Whoever cares about our needs, our problems, our interests—we feel they're human, and we're willing to do business with them, even if their product doesn't fully solve our problems.

You can't expect the product to speak for itself or understand us. In most cases, we don't know your product or your competitor's well, but we know our problems and needs. Whoever maps their product's features to our problems is the one we think has a good product. Don't expect us to do that mapping; we won't and can't be bothered. That's your job as salespeople.

You provide a product; your competitor provides a solution. We prefer those who deliver results over those who deliver tools, and we're willing to pay more for results.

Mr. Niu's words hit the nail on the head, enlightening. In summary, the core is just one sentence: not selling, but buying together with the customer. That is:

Forget the product, truly be customer-centric, understand the customer's thoughts and solve needs; Understand the customer's purchasing logic and process; sell the way they buy; Truly care about the customer's interests and clarify the project structure.

Do these well, and the product will sell itself, and you won't do so many stupid things. Unfortunately, we're too eager to sell, too rushed, so we can't sell! This seems like the paradox of sales, but it's also the truth.

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