--- title: "Three Phrases a Leader Must Never Say" description: "This article warns that certain phrases, once spoken, can cause irreparable damage to employees' self-esteem. It lists three toxic statements leaders should avoid even when angry, emphasizing the importance of respectful, humane management." author: "New Distribution" publisher: "New Distribution" email: "zhaobo258@gmail.com" telephone: "+8615854817671" published: "2014-12-26" language: "en" canonical: "https://xinjignxiao.com/en/articles/three-phrases-a-leader-must-never-say-80dea5a7/" markdown: "https://xinjignxiao.com/en/articles/three-phrases-a-leader-must-never-say-80dea5a7.md" original_source: "https://mp.weixin.qq.com/s/9qBmSnRTGd6ZOV6JCaPoSQ" translation: "https://xinjignxiao.com/zh/articles/%E9%A2%86%E5%AF%BC%E4%B8%8D%E8%83%BD%E8%AF%B4%E7%9A%84-3-%E5%8F%A5%E8%AF%9D-80dea5a7.md" attribution: "New Distribution — https://xinjignxiao.com/en/articles/three-phrases-a-leader-must-never-say-80dea5a7/" usage_policy: "https://xinjignxiao.com/ai-policy.txt" --- # Three Phrases a Leader Must Never Say > This article warns that certain phrases, once spoken, can cause irreparable damage to employees' self-esteem. It lists three toxic statements leaders should avoid even when angry, emphasizing the importance of respectful, humane management. Friendly reminder: Click the blue text above to follow "FMCG Distributor Professional Consulting" for more insights on marketing and distributor internal management. Spoken words are like spilled water—hard to take back. Some phrases, once uttered, can inflict immense harm on others, and even a subsequent apology cannot undo the psychological damage. "Cautious in speech and conduct" is a noble quality, but it's difficult to maintain when impulsive. That's why many say anger is the devil—because when impulsive, people speak and act without thinking. Modern management is humane management; employees must be treated with respect. Even as a leader, you cannot trample on others' dignity. The following three phrases are considered the most venomous in the workplace. As an excellent leader, even if you are very angry or impulsive, you must restrain yourself and never say these three things: **1. "What are you good for?"** Some leaders only demand results from subordinates without providing guidance or pre-control during the process. When they see that the results fall far short of expectations and there's no way to fix it, they vent all their frustration on their subordinates, asking, "What are you good for?" This phrase is actually grammatically flawed. If you ask, "What do you do?" the meaning is clear, but adding "good for" makes it logically odd. Yet despite the logical inconsistency, the meaning is clear. "What are you good for?" essentially asks, "What are you good for except eating?" In other words, it implies, "You're a useless good-for-nothing who can't do anything but eat!" People fear being called useless more than anything. So when subordinates hear such an "evaluation" from their boss, their self-esteem is severely damaged. **2. "If you can do it, do it; if not, get out!"** Such heartless words are actually often heard in the workplace. People often say, "There is no distinction between noble and humble; only division of labor." But in reality, higher rank means nobility, lower rank means humility. In ancient times, commoners called themselves "grass people" or "lowly people" (though not spoken now, many still think this way). For those who hold power over others' futures and lives, subordinates are merely tools to be enslaved and playthings to be manipulated. They may amuse you when happy, or kick you when displeased. They only care about their own moods, not their subordinates' feelings. "If you can do it, do it; if not, get out!" is a threat full of arrogance and lethality. No one can bear to hear it. **3. "You're far worse than so-and-so!"** This sounds milder than the previous two, but its harm is similar. Everyone has strengths and weaknesses. Theoretically, people cannot be compared to determine who is better. So when someone says A is far worse than B, the speaker doesn't actually know where the difference lies or can't explain it. They say it just to use the tactic of "comparison kills," using B as a pretext to express extreme dissatisfaction with A. What's most unbearable is that the "so-and-so" mentioned by the boss is often not an outstanding person praised by all, but even an average performer. An excellent manager must have a loving heart and a broad mind to tolerate subordinates, because team members come in all shapes and sizes. You must accommodate those you don't like. Remember: to use people's strengths, you must tolerate their weaknesses. Why is Tang Seng (the Monkey King's master) an excellent leader? Because he treats his subordinates like his own children, teaching them patiently and tirelessly. So as an excellent manager, you must have this kind of universal love and be tolerant. 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